He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
