So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
