So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
