He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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