yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Randomize
