I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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