Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
There's a naked man in my car right now.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
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