I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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