he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
