Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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