just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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