Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize