the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Randomize
