Where is the hickey?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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