Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
