She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize