i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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