Walk of Shame. In a state park.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
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