it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
