Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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