Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
