In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
