How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
