That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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