Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
