yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize