North Korea, Best Korea!
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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