C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
dude i'm inner monologue high
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Alive.
So much puke
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
sex in a hospital.. check
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Randomize
