I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Let's paint friendship bongs
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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