Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
