Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
