Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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