no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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