therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
