Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
