Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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