i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
