OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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