JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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