4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
4 words: hood of his car
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Randomize
