We won't sleep together?
another moral hangover. fuck.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize