i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
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