your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
