alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
