Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Randomize
