kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Randomize