with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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