is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
