I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
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