There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I need to wash the frat house off of me
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Randomize